Soon afterwards, I entered college and during my college years, I relied heavily on older students for getting around campus. In hindsight, most of the upper classmen with whom I associated were early seeds of the do-your-own-thing generation. I was amazed by her transformation. She was certainly much different than before. However, what I remembered most of our discussion was not how different she was, but what she saw in me. Having heard all my questions, my sister closed our conversation by saying, “You believe, but with shadows of doubt.” I was crushed! Now that I was aware of my “shadows,” I struggled to have a true sense of peace about my relationship with God. How was I to rid myself of shadows of doubt?
“Beyond a shadow of doubt” first stuck with me at age seventeen. One Sunday evening my dad asked me to drive my sister back to college. Months earlier my sister had completely turned her life over to Jesus so, while I was driving, she told me of her renewed life in Christ. We talked for miles on end and, without realizing, passed our destination.
For the majority of my life I lived in the company of those who professed Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior. When I was a child, my professing parents taught me about Jesus through Bible stories and books of the Old and New Testaments. As a pre-teen, I gained knowledge of Jesus and the One who sent Him by listening to church pastors and Sunday school teachers.Īt age eleven I made a public profession of faith. I affirmed that the only way to enter God’s Kingdom was through confession of sins, repentance and the belief that Jesus Christ, God’s only son, is the only way to salvation.īut here was the dilemma. With a sincere heart, I confessed my sins, repented and believed that Jesus Christ saved me from eternal death. Was I certain “beyond a shadow of doubt?” No. Why? The reason was simple I was one hopeless skeptic.
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